Saturday 19 November 2011

Weepy and Weird

I'll start with the bad news: this post might be a downer. Things are getting pretty emotional over here and I don't even have a hilarious Vincent picture to make it better.

At least there is some good news: this post won't be quite as long as the last one. I've gotten the ranting out of my system. At least for now....

These last few weeks have been much harder than I imagined. We are in full-on moving mode: packing up everything in our apartment, finalizing the administrative stuff and saying our good-byes, one by one.

The good-byes are the hardest because it feels like everything is a goodbye. Our last trip to Geneva, the last time we see certain friends here, the last fondue in front of the fireplace, our last hike in the Jura. As the clock counts down (10 more days!), nearly everything we do is a "last."

We've both moved enough in the last ten years that we should be jaded and immune to it all by now, but unfortunately for my tear ducts, that's not the case.

Leaving Switzerland is really, really hard for both of us, especially me. Part of it is that we love living here and will miss it, but I suspect the real reason it is so difficult to say goodbye is because Switzerland was the first time Vincent and I were able to actually start our life together as a couple. We had moved around so much and been apart for so long before moving here that it felt like our little haven where we could finally be together and build our future. Leaving Switzerland feels like we are saying goodbye to those wonderful memories of being a newly married couple embarking on a new adventure together.

The trip of course is another adventure altogether. It's totally cheesy, but it really feels like we are closing one chapter of our lives and opening a new one.

But this in-between phase is seriously wearing on us. I have been randomly bursting into tears on a nearly daily basis, which is exhausting for poor Vincent and straight up embarrassing for me. Today, we said goodbye to our friends Michael and Celine (Salut les Auvergnats!), and as soon as we were out of their sight, I dissolved into a blubbering mess. It wasn't that I can't go a year without seeing people I care about- I'm pretty used to that by now. What made me cry- and still makes me cry when I think about it- was the feeling that we are ending a phase of our lives that has been so important and formative and enjoyable, and we have no idea what to expect from the next phase.

This coming week will present even more goodbyes- to the rest of our friends, to my car (my poor little Clio, sniff sniff...), and lastly, to Gingins and our apartment. Needless to say, I expect to be an emotional disaster in the coming days.

And speaking of disaster- this is the state our sweet, innocent apartment is currently in due to our packing efforts:

If you've never seen our apartment, we don't normally live like animals.... In fact, here's an idea of what our place usually looks like.





















Awww man, I'm going to miss our apartment....

3 comments:

  1. Hang in there, Elissa! Since you've opened the door to cliches ... when one door closes another one opens...? Looking forward to seeing you both before your next big adventure!

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  2. I totally get this. It's sad. I feel sad just reading it, because I've had similar experiences. There's no place like home, especially your first home as an adult with your spouse or partner. However, you're flipping the final page of a great chapter to the first page of another amazing one. I'm seriously hoping to see you both in South Africa. Best wishes and good cheer to you both in the coming days.

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  3. Thanks for your support, guys! Of course, I feel like a huge a-hole feeling sorry for myself when I am so grateful to be able to do a trip like this. I guess these kinds of feelings are normal during any big change. Thanks for the love, it means a lot to me!

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